Ok so im pregnant.........will get to that later on. Again, this is going to be a long post :) but keep reading, you may find what you like.
Sorry, Pele, ndo!!!! I know ive been MIA for a while but no be my fault. I've been extremely busy, traveling and dealing with a lot of people....wooo fedex should employ me for logistics management cos when you can safely deal with a rowdy, demanding 9ja bunch, u don try abeg. Needless to say im tired but we thank God o. I can't complain too much because I am busy due to answered prayers. When they say God's time is ALWAYS on time and that "For the vision [is] yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak, and not lie: though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry." I am a living testimony. So my brothers and sisters, the GOD that buttered my bread shall put sugar in your tea o!!!!! Keep the faith
I am not pregnant jo............*NTA 2, chanel 5, ela oju kan* lol Ok so I promised this post a while ago so I may still just ramble on but no wahala. Ok so let me get the Christian perspective out of the way. As some of you have already said: our body is the temple of God so no kokolization before marriage. However, as with many issues, I don't think cause you got pregnant before marriage you will go to hell or cause you didnt you will go to heaven. Now I don't personally know a lot of people that have gotten pregnant before marriage but I have heard stories of when all ended well despite the bele on wedding day. That being said, there are a few groups of people that pre-wedding pregnancy really doesn't sit well for me. Now its not my place to judge put I can say my opinion jare.
1. Teen/young mothers: I am a strong watcher of 16 and pregnant. For these ladies, I don't even think getting married would help their kids have a more stable home cos everything was messed up from the dating start. Most got pregnant by mistake after few months of dating, having sex kinda sorta out of peer pressure, without a care in the world. A kid can't raise a kid. Forget all the welfare something sef, these young parents, by having these kids so young (even with family support), don't give their children the chance to be very useful to society...the statistics are against them and then it starts a cycle, coupled with poverty and all, that becomes difficult for generations to break. That's just a bit selfish to me. However, when I think of 9ja, once you get over the initial stigma part, with all the family and househelps we have around, you may still be able to get you act together so as to give your child a better future.......THIS IS NOT ADVOCATING FOR 9JA TEENS TO GO GET PREGNANT BIKO.
2. Celebrities: Now it is done here in the US too but I will focus more on the 9ja ones because that is what prompted this post. As a PHD holder in nollywood affairs and PHD candidate for 9ja celeb news, it has come to my notice that a lot of them seem to be getting pregnant before they get married. Now it really isn't our business.....i dont even think its something you can say oh young girls and boys look up to you so its bad. What worries me more is that the rumors seem to be that the pregnancy prompted the wedding or the baby daddy is unknown.....none of which is best for the child (ofcourse there are exceptions with strong single mothers and daddys holding it down and pregnancy induced marriages that end well). Just to clarify, if you are getting married and you get pregnant before wedding day, dats one thing. but if you weren't really on the marriage path and just to save face you get married cos of the the pregnancy, yawa fit gas (this is what I mean by pregnancy induced wedding...hope the difference between the 2 is clear ppl). A chilling case in point: Uche Iwuji. Now if you dont really watch 9ja films you may not know here because she isn't a consistent face in movies. However, you may have come across her interview on linda ikeji's blog. The gist of the thing was that she had a miscarriage which is sad but the chilling part was that the baby daddy seemed nothing more than friends with benefits and she was ok with that. Again, not a good something for the child.
Solutions to out of wedlock pregnancy: I know there are churches that do pregnancy test before allowing you to wed in the church and some schools sef that do pregnancy test before allowing you to graduate. Ermm all that is a but extra too me now. Ok so if they are pregnant and you won't allow them to wed, shey dey should go and abort it (another sin) or live unmarried and keep having kids (which is also not Biblically ok). I get the point that maybe its to discourage sex before marriage but as sisi Mena pointed out, children are gifts from God. Shey dey will start givin breath analyzer test on sunday morning before service to see if you drank alcohol or something cos some ppl head to church from d club. While I get trying to uphold the doctrines of the faith, the approach is a bit extra for me jo
Exceptions to the rule: I know the Bible doesn't advocate sex before marriage and really holds matrimony as sacred. However, I don't believe that marriage is a fix for all problems.....maybe slightly feeling that marriage may not be all that it is cracked up to be. And then I read a passage that said that said something like: there will be a time when people will be decieved that marriage isn't all that and they can do without it. I really can't remember the passage but it was as if God was saying, "Olori, you better be thinking of the marriage because it is for you and all my children. don't be deceived". God definitely heard my mums prayers cos she cant wait to plan wedding! That being said, if you wait till you get married to have sex or have kids, that doesn't mean the marriage will be wonderful or your kids will turn out better than the teenage, single mums kids. People like Oprah and Brad and Angelina are lovers that live together and have kids and all seems well. Whereas there are Christian homes where the rules were followed and daddy is molesting daughter and mother cant speak out.
Question: in the last post someone said she did her legal/court wedding 6 months back but was 2 months pregnant on the wedding day so does that count as out of wedlock pregnancy?
Answer: I dont know :) because I am tired but off the top of my tired head, I will say it depends so thats a yes and no. I will think about it and explain better when I return for the second post. That being said, this post may not really apply to you cos you don't seem to fall in the pregnancy induced marriage category....see definition above :)................ppl what do you think, does she qualify as out of wedlock pregnancy?
Anyway, the floor is now open to you guys, feel free to agree, disagree, expantiate and discuss.
P.S: I really do have a 419 story and I need to shout out to some bloggers (prizm and hazel and Myne: wetin sick you now?) and then those of you have been commenting and stopping by despite my absence (A very big thank you!!!) but tire hook me for neck like bow tie so later on today or tomorrow, I shall gist you dat one